Heated Arguments
by LaughingLadyLuna
Summary: A series of one shots with different HP characters fighting. First up, Lily and James have one of their infamous arguments in sixth year while James is being a prat.
1. Chapter 1

There I was, minding my own damn business in the Prefect study room in the library, when _he _strides in, barely managing to not fall over from the weight of his enormous head. God, even when I just refer to him I get shivers of disgust and bile rises in my throat. I want to know who thought he should exist, with his cocky, big headed, "_I'm the hottest thing to walk the Earth", _attitude. Because really, he does nothing to contribute to the running and order of the world. He's stupid and pointless, like quidditch. Mosquito's do more than he does for goodness sake. I think we should just banish him from where normal human beings are and save us all the pain.

Sorry, I got a little carried away. Anyways… where was I? Oh yeah, so he parades into _my _study room and puts his books on the table, and knocks mine to the floor to make room for them.

"Evans, what a pleasant surprise!" Yeah right, what a load of dragon dung. I bet he had this planned. He's always trying to find ways to corner me and pressure me into going out with him. As if that would ever happen because I wouldn't touch him even if it would keep me from dying.

I shoot him the deadliest glare that I can muster and sigh loudly to show my annoyance. "What in the hell do you want? And please make this snappy 'cause I have papers to write." So here I am, trying to be as rude as I possibly can and he's got this Cheshire Cat smile plastered on his face like I'm some canary he's about to devour. If I couldn't get expelled for it, I would use a slicing charm and take that right off his face…

But my musing of ways to hurt him distracted me and he was able to sit down, putting his muddy feet up on the table, and right onto my Ancient Runes essay. "Well you see Evans; I have a proposition for you. And it really-"he starts to say before I cut him off.

"I'm sorry, but you took too long. I said to make it snappy, Potter, and obviously you can't get your mouth and brain to cooperate enough to get out a simple sentence. So if you would please get your nasty feet off my homework and leave I'll be able to hate you from a distance, just the way I like it."

Do you want to know what he did now? Well I'll tell you what he did; the smarmy bastard started laughing. Like what I was saying was funny! Can you believe his nerve? I call him stupid and nasty and tell him that I hate him and he starts to laugh! He has some serious problems.

"Fine," he chuckled, "I'll make this quick; will you go out with me?"

Ok, so it wasn't quite as bad and long winded as I thought it would be but it is still disgusting. He has asked me out every day of the school year for nearly five years now and just what makes him think I would change my mind?

"Potter, do you have Alzheimer's? Some sort of short term memory disorder? Or maybe all of the air in your head has created too much pressure on your small brain. You asked me the same question at lunch yesterday and I said no. You asked me at dinner: no. You asked me this morning during Defense and I told you that I would rather have sex with Snivellus in the middle of the dining hall than be in the same room alone with you.

"Not to mention that last night, after you asked me out at dinner, you had a date with Marlene McKinnon who just happens to be one of my best friends and she lives in the dorm room with me. So when she came in at around 3 o'clock in the morning, she was positively beaming and giddy because she just lost her virginity to 'Sex God James Potter' and she made sure to tell us _all_ of the details and about how you promised to take her out again tonight.

"Now please, tell me why I should come anywhere near you out of my own free will, much less go out with you?" Ha! You should have seen the look on his face when I finished my tirade. He was shocked and he looked like a fish out of water. I almost grinned with satisfaction, but I caught myself just in time and continued to glare quite well.

But all too quickly, Potter regained his composure and smiled the annoying smile again and said simply, "Because I love you."

Have you ever heard a bigger bunch bull shit in your life? He loves me! _Right!_ I don't even think Potter is capable of feeing anything but selfish, horny, or selfishly horny.

"No, you know what? I'm sick of this. I'm sick of your stupid mind games and your incessant begging and your relentless need to annoy me. Do not come in here and tell me that you love me out of nowhere. You don't even know me. And you're dating one of my best friends. How dare you say that to me? You have no right to mess with my head like that. So I'm leaving now and if you ever come near me outside of classes again I will castrate you and tell Marlene what you said. See how many times you get laid after _that_, Mr. Potter."

This whole time I had been throwing things into my bag and I finally pulled it over my shoulder and practically ran as fast as I could out the door. But I did hear him say to himself, "I think she's warming up to me."

As if.


	2. Chapter 2

Saturdays were always the best days. There was something magical about them. Maybe it was the sleeping in or the all day, whenever you felt like eating it, breakfast, or knowing that you had all day tomorrow to do homework and study for the N.E.W.T.'s . Nothing could bring a man down on a Saturday. Arthur Weasley practically skipped into the great hall at about eleven, planning to eat his breakfast feast and then return to the Gryffindor common room for a fantastic day of nothing.

Arthur spotted the red head of his long time girlfriend, Molly Prewett, at the far end of the Gryffindor table and wandered over. He placed a kiss of the top of her head and plopped onto the bench next to her. "What's up, gorgeous?" he asked casually, pilling about 10 pancakes onto his plate at once so they were in danger of toppling over. "Can you pass the syrup?"

Several moments passed with no response, so Arthur was forced to turn away from his beloved plate and check on the status of his syrup-getting. What he saw, however, was not the gloriously delicious tree sap, but a livid, red faced, tight lipped, tear filled woman glaring at him.

"Pass the syrup? PASS THE SYRUP? How dare you, Arthur Bilcock Weasley!" She shrieked into his ear, making him cringe and his ear drums throb. "What kind of a question is that, you giant git?" With that, she grabbed the orange juice, dumped it over his head, and stormed out of the great hall with more than a few people staring after her.

In a state of total shock, Arthur sat and sputtered a few incomprehensible words before regaining the power of speech. He turned to Molly's best friend, Betsy Bones who had been sitting across the table and asked, "What in the name of Merlin was **that **about? Has she gone completely mental?"

"I don't know." Betsy responded. "I've known Molly basically all my life and she wouldn't even tell me. She just sat there, staring at nothing until she spazzed out at you. You must have done something bloody awful, Weasley."

Sadly and slowly, Arthur stood up from his chair and trudged toward the door, realizing that an extremely pissed off girlfriend could ruin any poor bloke's Saturday. He was just confused. When they had talked last night in the common room she had been perfectly happy, a little distracted, maybe, but fine enough. Surely he hadn't done anything to her in his sleep. Perhaps he was a sleep walker and didn't know it. Or possibly she was expecting a "Midnight Visit" from him? He didn't remember agreeing to meet her for a late night rendezvous, but then again. Arthur couldn't remember a lot of things. But still, forgetting a date didn't constitute orange-juice-over-the-head anger.

Molly wasn't in the Gryffindor common room, not that he really expected her to be. That would have been too easy, and an angry Molly Prewett liked to make things as difficult for him as they could possibly get. Sometimes he thought "Show No Mercy" was her secret motto. But that was also one of the things he loved about her, the determination, never backing down, standing up for what she believed in. She wouldn't be the same without her damn stubbornness, and Arthur wouldn't change that about her anyway. _'She is who she is.'_ He thought hopelessly.

After having a 3rd year girl check the 7th year dormitories for her, Arthur left the tower with several ideas of where to look. She wasn't hiding in the library, in any of the girls' loos, or in the second floor, empty broom cupboard, a favorite place of theirs for a few moments alone. He went outside and checked several gardens and even Hagrid's pumpkin patch but to no avail. Just as he was about to go inside and wait for her to come to him, he heard a distant Molly-like scream from the quidditch pitch.

Now that he actually knew where she was, Arthur was in no hurry to actually get there. An angry Molly was a force to be reckoned with, and what kind of person rushed a confrontation like that. Taking baby steps the whole way, it took him a good ten minutes to get there and another five to work up the courage to actually go into the stadium. Her yelling and cursing and fuming were so loud that he couldn't even think of what to say. Eventually, he summoned all of the courage he had and stepped inside.

"Molly, dear?" he called uncertainly and she whipped around to stare at him, eyes ablaze. He had the sudden urge to grab something red and use it to distract her, like in the bull fight slides he had seen in muggle studies. They really were a wonderfully strange people, muggles. No matter how much he studied them, they always surprised him with their creative ways. He would certainly like to have a conversation with the person who invented bull fighting, they must be-

"WHAT DO YOU WANT?" she yelled, making him jump and startling him out of his muggle thoughts. "HAVEN'T YOU DONE ENOUGH?"

_'Deep calm breaths. Chill. Say your mantra'. _Arthur thought to himself. "Done enough of what, Molly dearest? Why don't you sit down and tell me what's wrong and then I can try to make it better."

At this her face went from red to purple and Arthur could have sworn there was smoke coming out of her ears. "Alright, I'll tell you what's wrong, you stupid, idiotic, dim, thick, sorry excuse for a man."

"Well, Molly there is really no need to call names here. Civility is-"

"I WILL CALL YOU ALL THE NAMES I WANT, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!" She shrieked, making Arthur shrink away from her. "Dumb, dense, slow, dim-witted, forgetful, wanker!"

Arthur thought carefully for a second before responding. "Forgetful, eh? So I did forget something. Your birthday is in September, Valentines Day was in February, and our anniversary isn't for another 3 weeks in June…." He continued contemplating what today or yesterday could have possibly been, but he just couldn't think of anything. "Molly, please, just tell me so I can be sorry." He pleaded.

She took several threatening steps toward him. "You want to be sorry, because I can show you sorry, you dilhole! Do you know what you forgot!"

Finally, Arthur could no longer stand being understanding and sympathetic. A man could only take so many insults at a time. "Obviously I don't know if I forgot, otherwise I would have remembered!" He yelled back in her face, getting ready for a spectacular row. But suddenly, Molly's resolve vanished, and she sunk to the ground.

With her head in her hand she muttered something that sounded like "Wrparthy".

Arthur crouched down and wrapped him arms around her, instantly forgetting all of the nasty things she had yelled. "Sorry, didn't catch that." He said.

She managed to sob out, "I… We… You…"

"Yes?"

"We are pregnant. You forgot to use the contraceptive charm that one time in the prefect bathtub."

_'Oh dear sweet Jesus,' _Arthur thought before passing out.

**A/N- I'm shockingly happy with how this chapter turned out. It's not as funny as the L/J, but it wasn't supposed to be. The Molly/Arthur combo is just so cute. Next up I think will be Remus and Sirius, I think. No guarantees, though, because the muse wants what it wants. Comments? Questions? REVIEW!**

**Chloeclyne- Sure you can use this story. Just one question, what are C2 and anime's?**


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